Tales from the Rails — Shayan Kahree #2

I loved her, but I don’t think she felt the same way about me. That was okay, though. Having her around was enough.

And then I trapped her in a pocket dimension…

Going on adventures with Missy — with Blue — was indescribable. It felt like every day was better than the previous one, and there was no end to it in sight. We may not have had a future together, but the present stretched on like the infinite train tracks ahead of us.

And I was happy.

I was really, truly, unimaginably happy — maybe for the first time, despite the fact I was living two lives.

I’d settled into the routine of conductor life quite easily, actually. The Researcher from the JGRE forged documents for me and put me in contact with Railroaders looking for a conductor. Most of them didn’t notice that my clumsiness didn’t match my supposed years of experience, which meant I was able to learn without garnering scrutiny. I hauled milk, or petrol, or textbooks, or whatever, wherever they wanted me to take it. They were completely unaware that I was a JGRE spy.

Information regarding the Mysterious Stranger was difficult to come by. Whoever the man is, he does a bang-up job of covering his tracks. But the deal with the Researcher was that I’d provide intel and he would provide the medication I needed to slow my mutation. Whenever I found that my med supplies were running low, I’d tap the communicator the Researcher had embedded behind my left ear and share some generic, fabricated information. And this way, I managed to cheat death.

But at what cost?

The deeper I became entrenched with the JGRE, the more sinister my assignments became. At first, I was merely an information mule, but with time my duties began to involve hunting other conductors the JGRE had targeted. I was granted access to otherworldly technology and given the missive to stop these men and women at all costs. I was told to get creative. The more fantastic the story, the less credible any witness reports, the better.

I took control of the weather and embedded a portal drop in a rain storm, sending kappas after a man hauling vegetables.

I sent a vampire to the past to attack a well-to-do foreign business man. Then, when I learned the vampire-man had made a living dealing in information regarding oddities and monsters, I sent a werewolf to attack a man in the swamps, hoping the vampire would tip off a man who ran a circus train.

That one was particularly convoluted.

There were the two boxers — not even conductors, but men at the end of their athletic careers — who I sent sirens and Plains after…

And there was Missy.

I acted out of panic. I know that I didn’t mean to hurt her. I know it. But she was going to figure it all out. She saw my veins; she saw what I’m becoming. What I am.

I had to do it.

I had to…

I had to.

I had to.

I had to…

But that was ridiculous, wasn’t it? I didn’t have to. I could’ve said “No” to the Researcher. I could’ve just turned into a tangle of vines and spared all of the pain I’d caused. I could’ve gone back to India, told my family I loved them, and died quietly.

I could’ve…?

I could.

I activated the communicator in my neck.

“What,” the Researcher said tonelessly.

“I need to speak with you in person,” I said. “Now.” The man in the white lab coat appeared before I could finish formulating my plan.

“This had better be important, Shayan,” he said. He lit a cigarette and took a long drag as the static which accompanied his appearance fizzled out.

“I’m done working for you,” I said, surprised by the shakiness in my voice. I said it again. “I’m done working for you.”

The researcher regarded me for several moments before speaking. “You’re not in a position to bargain with me.”

“I don’t care,” I practically spat. A sickening cocktail of feelings began to churn in my chest.

Grief.

Anger.

Regret.

Revulsion.

“I didn’t sign up to hurt innocent people,” I said. “This wasn’t the bargain.”

“As I recall, our ‘bargain,’” here he did air quotes, “was that you do everything I say, and I won’t slip you a drug that turns you into a ficus on the spot.” The Researcher hiked up his right sleeve to check his watch. “Are we done here? I don’t have time for whatever cute insurrection you’re thinking of attempting.”

I was too distracted by something he’d said to notice his taunt. “Slip me a drug that turns me into a plant on the spot? So — ”

“My god, you’re really that stupid?” The researcher flicked his cig to the floor of the train car and snubbed it under his shoe. “People don’t develop freak mutations that slowly turn them into plants, Shayan. Not in this reality, anyway…”

I felt another emotion clouding the mix: Horror. I’d just been a pawn all along. “But…why?” I stammered. “Why me?”

The Researcher stifled a laugh. “Because you were nearby. And because you aren’t special, Shayan. You never will be. I checked in all of the target futures the JGRE is working to prevent. You aren’t in a single one of them. No matter how you look at it, Shayan Kahree is utterly inconsequential.”

“Incon — ?” I was interrupted by my surging emotions spilling over, culminating in a blinding rage. Without thinking, I took a portal drop from my pocket and hurled it at the Researcher. He dodged it, and I threw another. And another. And another.

“Do you really think you can trap me using my own invention?” he scoffed when I stopped to catch my breath. My heart was pounding and my vision was blurred. I wasn’t acting on logic; I was acting on instinct. I didn’t care what happened to me anymore.

All I could think of was Missy.

“Fine,” the Researcher said. “I don’t have time for this. I release you from your duties, Shayan.” He pulled a device from his pocket and pressed a button. I felt a burning sensation behind my left ear, and when I touched the spot, I could no longer feel the communicator that had been there.

“Have fun dying slowly,” he said. “I hope it hurts.”

My field of vision was overcome by static, and when it cleared, I was in an empty field. I sat there and I cried.

I cried for myself.

I cried for all the people I’d hurt.

I cried for Missy.

I cried for all of the injustice in the world, and the part I had played in causing my portion of it.

When I had spent all of my emotion, I felt my pockets. I still had my portal drops and I still had my pills. I checked my medication supply. If I rationed it, I thought I might have enough to last a few weeks.

If I was going to do something, I’d have to do it fast.

Next Stops

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